The Ego’s Resistance: Why We Fight Against Being Still
Have you ever sat down to pray or be still and felt an almost immediate urge to check your phone, start a task, or let your mind race through tomorrow’s schedule? That impulse has a name: resistance. And it comes from the part of us called the ego—the insecure, fear-filled voice that feeds on the thoughts and emotions of our unconscious mind.
In Chapter 6 of Choosing Presence, Jim Heaney explains that resistance is the negative energy we pour into avoiding what is actually happening right now. The ego thrives on memory and anticipation—replaying the past, rehearsing the future—because that is where it draws its power. But in the present moment, the ego’s stories lose their grip. That is why stillness feels so threatening: presence is the one place the ego cannot survive.
We hear the excuses all the time—and we tell them to ourselves: “I don’t have time.” “I’m too busy.” “I’ll do it later.” These are not reasons. They are the ego’s resistance dressed up as logic. The truth is, we resist presence because it asks us to let go of control and surrender to God’s Spirit. But when we recognize that urge to escape for what it really is, something shifts. We stop fighting. We breathe. And in that simple act of choosing stillness over distraction, we step through the gate into God’s peace.
Choosing Presence is an Illuman Partner Program.
Brian Mueller – Poet, Community Organizer, and Spiritual Guide
Brian Mueller is a poet and community organizer based in Dayton, Ohio. He serves as Director of Education & Engagement for ChoosingPresence.org and is an active member of the Ohio Chapter of Illuman, where he co-leads writing retreats that support men’s spiritual journeys. As a writer, Brian is known for his candid, accessible poetry, with works including Cock‑A‑Doodle‑Doo: 100 Morning Haiku, the Poem of the Day series, and the Bull Series. Inspired by poets like Rumi and Mary Oliver, he believes everyone carries the voice of a poet within.
